Podcast Ep 313 - My Health Update

In this episode, I share my personal health journey, the decisions I've made regarding medication, and how I consciously steer my mindset to stay positive and productive. Whether you're dealing with your own health issues or just looking for ways to overcome life's obstacles, this episode offers valuable insights and inspiration. Let's flourish together!

Show Notes:

• A brief recap of Heather's neurological event earlier in the year and her experience since.
• Discussion on starting medication, dealing with side effects, and the decision-making process.
• Tips and techniques Heather uses to keep her mind positive and focused.
• How managing her health has influenced her business and personal growth.
• Future plans and the importance of staying optimistic.

How to Support the Podcast:

• Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or wherever you listen to podcasts. Please like, share, and leave a review.
• If you like the content, please share with your friends by posting on social media so that we can reach and impact more people.

Connect:

Heather Lahtinen: Website, Facebook, Instagram

TRANSCRIPT

You're listening to the Flourish Academy podcast and today I'm sharing how I manage my mind around the crap I don't like. My name is Heather Lawton and I'm a photographer,
educator and entrepreneur and I founded the Flourish Academy is a resource for photographers of all levels. We want to help you pursue your passion on your own terms because we believe there is room for everyone.
In this podcast, we focus on creating breakthroughs with your mindset to discover the things that are really holding you back in business. and life. Earlier this year, I had a bit of a,
shall we say, neurological situation and in episodes 294 and 297, I shared all about that, but I wanted to give you a little bit of a health update and that's not because I think everyone cares about my health,
but I think it is relevant to share how I am managing my mind around Thank you. It's been almost six months since I had a major,
okay, they want to classify it as a seizure. I just call it a neurological indiscretion, but essentially my brain shut down. It was like, we're done here. And the neurologist really wanted me to start medication and I really did not want to do that because I'm just hesitant to take anything long term that,
you know. affects my brain. But ultimately I did decide with their guidance that I was going to take this medication in order to prevent future episodes.
The PA had told me, you know, you really don't want to have another seizure and every seizure you have makes the next one more likely and there could be damage that occurs because of it.
seizures like brain damage or injury, you know, any of those things. And of course, that's not what I wanted. So they put me on a medication called lacosamide.
They wanted to start me on Capra, but I wasn't interested in the side effect of rage. So I asked for something different. It should be noted, however, that I did not look up the side effects of this medication because once something gets into my brain,
I tend to manifest it. So I just didn't want to know. So be careful what you expose yourself to at any rate. I was still nervous to take this. So they were very kind to me and they suggested that I wait,
what's the word? Like, you know how when you wean yourself off of a medication, what, what would it be called if you're weaning yourself on something? Just like stepping on it. dosage, I guess,
but I started by taking a half of one pill in the evening and then I graduated to a whole pill and then a half in the morning. Anyway, I stepped myself up really,
really slowly so that my body could get used to this medication and it was going pretty well. I felt good. I didn't notice any strange side effects.
And in that same timeframe, we we traveled to Denver, Colorado. Actually, we stayed at a friend's condo in Vale, which was incredible.
Evan and Craig were snowboarding and skiing and it was just amazing and beautiful. It was so fun. I don't think I had ever been at an elevation that high.
Denver is 5 ,000 feet above sea level and Vale is 8 ,000 feet above sea level. me, you know, make sure you drink water, make sure you get plenty of rest. You're not going to sleep well because your brain thinks you can't breathe.
And this kind of concerned me, but okay, I was really alert and I did really well. We had fun. But on the way back to the airport from Vale,
I started not feeling well and it's actually really hard to describe. It was just kind of like I was really tired and out of it. I couldn't put my finger on it, but we stopped for dinner at In -N -Out Burger in Denver.
We were staying at the hotel at the airport that night. We were flying out early the next morning and I was having this conversation with my kids and I was like, slow. I felt slow.
Like I was slow to process and respond. But again, I didn't think much of it. I was just like, what? I'm just really tired. Make sure you drink more water. So we get to the hotel and Craig drops us off because he's going to return the rental and he gets real close to me and he says,
are you okay? And I was like, yeah, I'm just really tired. So we get checked into the hotel, we go up to the room and we're unpacking. And Ella says to me,
well, it's only six 30. What are we going to do the rest of the evening? And that's the last. thing I remember. So I had another seizure, neurological indiscretion in the hotel at the western in Denver.
And she said she saw it on my face. Like I just went out. So luckily I was on the floor emptying my suitcase when it happened. So I just kind of fell over. Craig wasn't there.
She had researched previously on what to do with someone who has a seizure. So I'm so proud of her. She put me on my side and covered me up, put a pillow under my head and Evan's like,
what should we do? And she's like, there's nothing we can do. We'll just wait for dad. And thankfully we had also had a conversation previously where I had said, listen, if I have another seizure,
I do not want you to call an ambulance or take me to the hospital unless I'm really injured from like falling over. So. I was not injured. Craig came into the room.
I was completely out of it. And then I, what happens is I seize up I guess for like 30 seconds and then I'm just unconscious for maybe 30 minutes or so. So I woke up and they were like all gathered around me and I was like,
Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that did not just happen. Oh, it was so destructive. Thankfully, another good thing was I did not bite my tongue,
which was the biggest part of my injury previously. And overall, that seizure felt more mild to me. But man, oh my gosh,
it was such a bummer. I don't what's a word stronger than distraught despondent. I was so upset by this because the whole reason I was taking the medication was to not have seizures,
right? Duh. Okay. So this is now, I don't know what time, eight at night. And I just went to bed and we were concerned about, you know, getting home and everything being okay.
I could not walk because my calves had seized up so tightly. So the benefit to that was I got a wheelchair in the airport. We got to the front of TSA. we were able to pre -board.
It was like the only positive thing that happened, but I was really nervous because I just didn't want to go down at the airport and I could not make sense of why that happened because I had been taking care of myself.
I thought I was doing well. It was, it was so depressing. Thankfully, another thankfully, look, I'm saying that a lot. We got home and... everything was well.
I contacted, I reached out to my neurologist and we were talking about it and a couple of things came up. Number one is I had only been on the full dose of that medication for about a week because remember,
I was like weaning myself up to it. That's not the right word, but I was working my way up to the full dosage. So it's not completely effective until you. been on it for about a month. So that's one thing.
Although I was still, I don't know. I wasn't totally buying into that. But then I did some research and I found out that for some people, significant changes in elevation can cause neurological issues for some people that,
you know, already have issues. So when you leave Vale at $8 ,000, feet and you drive to Denver, 5 ,000 feet, I'm, I believe there is a spot on one of these passes where you actually hit 12 ,000 feet.
So you're already pretty high. You go up even higher and then you come down and you can see how that might impact actually a healthy person. If you're not properly hydrating,
you're just not used to it. So I started at the. okay, well, maybe that's an explanation. Maybe, but now I'm gonna be afraid to travel in the mountains because I'm gonna worry about it.
I actually was unable to talk to anyone about this. Oh, this was early March, by the way. I think it was March 5th. I was unable to speak about this for at least a month,
maybe even a little bit longer because I was just so upset. I couldn't reconcile this. at all. So when it happened in January, I was like, Oh, that makes sense. Perfect storm.
All of these things had happened. And this time I just couldn't understand. Although my neurologist seemed fairly unfazed. She called this, and I quote,
a provoked event. I was like, I'm not trying to provoke anything. Oh, okay, it took me a while to improve my abs. shall we say about this situation?
But in the meantime, I had to have an EEG and an MRI, both with and without contrast. This, these were already planned. So at my EEG,
they discover that there's some slowing in the left frontal lobe, which I had the same results when I had an EEG in 2021. So nothing has changed,
which is a good thing. And that could be the way my brain has always been. Cause you know, you just don't know, but my kids were like, Oh mom, we always knew you were slow. Okay. So funny. And then the MRI,
when I read the results of the MR, by the way, you know how they have these portals where you can get in and read your test results before you speak with your doctor. That's kind of dangerous.
Don't you think? Because you start to read these things and you're like, Oh my gosh, I'm brain dead. When I read the results, I was like, Oh my gosh, I'm brain dead. doctor and I was like, am I brain dead?
Because that is what I'm thinking this means. And she said, Heather, actually, this EEG is completely inconclusive. It does not show any signs of epilepsy.
That doesn't rule it out, but you don't have markers. So that's a good thing, okay. The MRI results came back and over and over again, it came back and over again. And I was like,
well, that's kind of hurtful. Have you seen my hippocampus? It's like extraordinarily remarkable, but you know, I'm kidding. Obviously, unremarkable means good.
I did not have any lesions in my brain, which was good news. Therefore, all of this, all of this testing, all this information has showed them exactly nothing.
So they have no idea why this happened or what's going on in my brain, which is very comforting. But hey, here we are. So here's what I've been doing to manage my mind around this,
because if I let my brain, well, if I, you know, allow it to come up with its own thoughts, if I leave it to its own devices, it is going to spiral about how I am for sure dying.
and of course brain dead. So what I have to do is consciously manage my thoughts by choosing to believe that everything is okay because in this moment, everything is okay.
I actually feel amazing. I have been working out consistently. I took a trip to Charlotte to teach a workshop of retreat for photographers with my friend Nicole Bagley.
I felt phenomenal. I was like so on my game. I've been taking really good care of myself, sleeping well, you know, I always say this, doing all the right things. If it happens again,
I am for sure gonna lose my mind. But in this moment, I think to myself, I feel great. So why should I worry about the future?
Or why should I ruminate on the past? I have been teaching in my... elevate program inside of the Flourish Academy, working with my one -on -one clients. I feel extremely focused and sharp.
I just joined a mastermind. I need to talk about that in a, an upcoming episode because it was the single biggest investment I've ever made in my brain, in my mind,
which guess what? Guess what? Tells me and sends a message to myself that I believe in me and I believe in you. of my brain. So I'm going to be okay. And I truly really believe that.
So then even if something were to happen in the future, I know that I can get back on track. So it kind of emboldens me in a way.
It's like something happens and we think it's permanent or that it's never going to change because we're uniformitarians and this is how it's always going to be. And I've learned that that simply isn't true.
Certainly life and your health are always evolving and changing, but you can always figure out how it's working in your favor. So I started to create a list right after this happened in January of all the things that were going well or things that were happening as a result of that seizure and how I was serving others,
impacting lives, growing my... business, etc. And that list at this point is very, very long and impactful and just makes my heart grow five sizes. I can't believe the opportunities I've been given or what I've been able to create as a result of really the fact that I don't have my driver's license,
which reminds me, because I reported that seizure in March, I will not be getting my driver's license now. until September because you have to, in Pennsylvania,
you have to be seizure free for six months. Originally, it was going to be June, early July because it happened in January, which means I'd be really close to getting it back right now.
But alas, I have several more months without a driver's license, which, oh my gosh, I had to work through this with my coach because I was getting my driver's license. head about it,
like how awful it was. I had to flip it again by asking myself, what does this make possible? One of the things it made possible was my ability to create new programs inside of my elevate group that are really helping people.
And the reason I was able to do that was because I was given the gift of time. I already believe that I own time. So, you know, scarcity around time is not an issue for me,
but I've been given more of it. So now I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm the master of owning time. And I am knocking this content out of the freaking park.
I just rewatched a training I created, I think it was like last month, and I was like, man, that's really good. I'm so proud. of what I've created. I'm so proud of my discipline and focus and the way I take care of myself and continue to move forward.
But that doesn't mean I don't have setbacks. Obviously there are challenges well in life and even in my own mind. This isn't, it's not like I've solved this completely.
It's like today I feel good and tomorrow I might have some thoughts I need to work on. But one thing I learned is that I've just decided I'm committed to this process.
I am committed to the process of my health and taking care of myself, no matter what that journey looks like, instead of thinking, I need to be,
you know, 100 % healthy and on track or, or I'm not like, I create these black and white either or situations. typically if I let my brain do what it wants to do. But I've had to reframe that and say like,
listen, things are going to happen, but I'm committed to the process of staying on track. And how do I do this? Well, I have two coaches I work with, a business coach and a,
a life coach. And that is extraordinarily helpful. I coach myself and I give myself the space. to process being upset,
like about driving, for instance, like I'm upset about it and I think that I shouldn't be upset because it's reality and I have to deal with it, but I have to, I have to be willing to process that emotion of,
yes, this actually sucks. It's very limiting and what does it make possible? So it's both and and I've got to tell you, I really, feel amazing,
like off the charts. And I'm not a positive Pollyanna. There are things that are really challenging and I feel great. Something interesting happened the other day though.
I met the dad of one of Evan's friends and he had given him a ride home from an event and I said, thank you so much. I'm just not able to drive right now.
I have a medical suspension on my license. And he said, yeah, my wife told me you had epilepsy and I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I put my hands up and I said,
that's what the neurologist tried to say, but I am not willing to receive that diagnosis. I had a slight neurological indiscretion in a few times and I feel great.
I'm just not allowed to drive. And you know, I don't mean to be repetitive, but nothing lasts forever. Circumstances, they don't last forever. They change thoughts shift with the wind.
Your feelings are always changing. So when a circumstance is challenging and you have maybe less than ideal thoughts around it and you feel like crap.
If you could just tell yourself, I'm at peace with this pain, this feeling, because I know it's temporary, you know, your, your feelings change all of the time because your thoughts are always changing.
So it just doesn't last forever. And I've got to tell you in January, when I was laying in bed, unable to move or talk or work or do anything, I had a very difficult time remembering that I,
I was, I was, I was it was really, really challenging to remind myself that it was temporary. I tried, I did in some days were better than others,
but then, you know, two, three weeks after the event, I was feeling a little bit better. There was a light at the end of the tunnel. I started to get back to work. I was feeling good, less focused on me,
more focused on others and things started to pick up. And really, except for myself. minor situation in Denver, things have been, you know, the trajectory has been upwards.
I've just been feeling better every day, every week. It's summer. The weather is fantastic. I am slightly just a little bit nervous about our trip to Alaska this summer,
but I did go to Charlotte. I flew to Charlotte. I had a great week. so I know that I can travel, I know I can manage my sleep because lack of sleep is one of the biggest triggers for people who have epilepsy.
Though I don't want to admit or think that I am that person, it's still worth knowing. I am going to just continue pouring into my clients and serving them and focusing on them and not myself.
And I am on track to build a million dollar business, which is mind blowing, incredible. I can't even believe it. And this is always going to be a part of that journey.
It's just going to be a good story. Oh, remember that year when they thought I had epilepsy? Yeah, that was crazy. But here's what became of it. And if you can project yourself into the future. you know,
I think that's one of the keys. I'm always thinking of future Heather. And if you can say to yourself, but yeah, in the future, this is going to be so amazing. And this is just gonna be a blip on the map.
Then maybe, you know, laying on the floor in your Western hotel room, maybe it's not as devastating as you think. I hope that you found this useful.
I'll see you in the next episode.